Why Am I Still Alone?

Art by Charbak Dipta

One of the things that discourages me when discussing politics is that the root causes of all problems are often attributed to external people or circumstances.

Self-reflection seems to be a rarity.

Instead, when an issue arises, the conversation inevitably veers towards identifying who should bear the blame and be held accountable.

Moreover, there is a pervasive belief that others need to change for these problems to be resolved. This mindset only served to make me feel powerless since, unless others change, I'm left trapped in my misery

This kind of thinking is not just limited to politics but also our personal lives. At times I do find myself blaming problems on external people and circumstances.

It can feel satisfying. There's an ease and comfort in thinking this way because it allows me to escape self-reflection.

But it’s unhelpful and limits my spiritual growth.

Change Your Inner Landscape

What if the true key to a better world isn't changing the world around us, but changing the world within us?

What if, instead of manipulating external circumstances, we focused on altering the internal lens through which we view the world?

By engaging in spiritual practices like prayer, mindfulness, or gratitude exercises, we can reframe our perspective.

Indeed, God will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves. (Quran 13:11)

The world becomes a mirror that reflects this newly cultivated inner state, turning what were once hurdles into stepping stones for personal growth.

Of course, life does present us with genuine challenges. Illness, loss, and social injustices are real, and I'm not saying a simple inward glance will make those vanish.

But how we relate to these trials—our inner posture, if you will—changes the experience of them.

The World as a Mirror

• In Relationships: Instead of trying to change your partner, focus on becoming a more understanding and compassionate person yourself. Your relationship will naturally evolve as a result.

• At Work: Instead of blaming your dissatisfaction on your job or your colleagues, consider focusing on your own work ethic and attitude. You'll find that your experience at work becomes much more rewarding.

• In Personal Growth: The people who succeed aren't those who were handed perfect conditions but those who maximized what they had. Change your mindset from a scarcity mentality to one of abundance and opportunity.

Question: What Changes When You Change?

If you adjusted your inner lens, how would that change the way you view your challenges? Would they still be roadblocks, or would they become opportunities for growth?

The Power of Internal Shifts

Changing yourself doesn't mean you give up on changing the world.

It means you acknowledge that there’s a connection between the inner world and outer world.

And the lever to change the outer world is the inner world. When you begin there, you influence:

• Your actions
• Your interactions
• And ultimately your environment.

The external world takes its cue from your internal world.